Prologue

6:46 PM

The rain came like a steady flow of tiny silver bullets, each exploding before reaching their destination. The windshield of my car was cracked and fingerprinted, but I could see the rain drops coming fast and furious, and I thought it odd they were perfectly angled against the direction I was journeying. For a moment I thought it may be a sign to turn around, that I was going the wrong way, and the pit of my stomach turned uneasily. This got me thinking how much the feeling of uneasiness and excitement really were alike, because both usually caused the physical reaction of my stomach to flip about. How strange, I began to realize, that the mind and body were so in tune. I’m not sure why this concept surprised me in any way, it was a simple fact to anyone else and I had known it all my life, but to experience it this night, it felt a little different. This turned to the conclusion that I most likely think too much, but that was alright with me. My constant flow of thought protected me from other feelings that may arise, and driving in the rain was just not a suitable time for breaking down. It was just too cliché for my taste. I made myself a promise to hold out until the clouds cleared, but the outlook was grim. I don’t think I’ve ever kept a promise that I’ve made to myself.

8:45 PM

As I inhaled, my throat felt tight. I floated out of my car, into my home, and onto my bed. Once there, I hadn’t even remembered walking to the house. It was like those times your driving and don’t know how you made it there, it’s as if you were in another world, with your thoughts. And this world was so real and so intense for a moment; you weren’t even in your body anymore. At least that’s what it feels like. That night, I thought a lot more. A lot more, until I fell asleep. You’ll have to forgive me. If I knew I’d be telling you this story, I wouldn’t have chosen right now to fall asleep.

11:25 AM

The next time I opened my eyes, the sun shown bright through my window, and although the previous night had been horrific, I decided the day was too beautiful to waste on wallowing, so I got dressed and drove my car into town. When I got to town, I realized I had not decided what I wanted to go for; I just sort of went because I didn’t have anything else to do. Mom and Dad were both at work, and my brother would probably be out with friends like usual. We’re twins, but nothing alike.